One day I won't be here anymore and I don't want you to feel alone or lonely because of that. As you get older, you'll brush closer and closer to death, what it means to you, and what you're supposed to do with all that mortal knowledge. I wanted to leave you a note in case you need it.
1. No one is coming for you. Your life is your life - it belongs to no one else. Don't expect the world to do you any favors. It's a hard place sometimes and most people won't ever understand the silent struggles you feel in your mind. Don't blame them for that.
2. Be Grateful; you can't be angry and grateful at the same time. There will be hundreds of times in your life when you feel anger, rage, or resentment toward people or situations. Try to reflect in those moments about what you are grateful for, because you could be in much more pain or live with much less. Rationalize your situation and give it no more power than it deserves. Be grateful.
3. Take care of your mother. She is the most wonderful person you will ever know. I've seen her shape your life even before you were born or had memories to remember. She is genuine and the incarnate of love. Respect her and protect her, if I am not around. She is allowed to live her life and be with whomever makes her happy. Don't deny her that because of my memory, that's not what I want.
4. Take action and go directly into the things you fear. If you fear a test, begin studying for it immediately. Even the act of starting will diminish the fear. If you one day find yourself drinking too much, address that too. Talk about it with those you trust, rationalize why you're doing it, and then train your ass off in the gym and by running mileage outside. This is the cure. But, whatever it is you fear, TAKE ACTION. Without it, you get nothing and go nowhere.
5. I don't know what kind of faith you are going to have. Feel free to believe in whatever you want - as long as it promotes virtue, kindness, and good things. My suggestion here is to study all religions as well as all science - neither one of them have all the answers, so it will be up to you live your life with strength and honor. Act as if God exists...because from my limited experience here...it seems the more good you genuinely do...the more good you actually get.
In the end when I die, I hope I'm bored with life. I hope all my friends are gone and I hope my wife is gone too; only my children are left thriving away in their lives with no concern that I am alone and close to the end.
I hope I've run the miles, lifted the iron, seen the oceans and forests, ate the food, and witnessed every permutation of every story there ever was.
I hope I’ve experienced all the emotions the mind and brain can produce with no bias toward the good or the bad I may have felt.
I hope I don't relate to the new generation much anymore; they don't honor the old ways, nor do I have much in common with them.
I hope I’ve prepared well for the end. Saying what needed to be said to the people who needed to hear it. I hope no one laments my exit and instead uses my memory as fuel and not fog.
I hope my ledger of life is full and my pages ripped with strike-through’s and misspellings here and there. Reformulations of my life written through experiences of pain and joy as the very best parts I am most proud of – and frankly what I might miss most.
I hope it's clear that suffering helped me, and, in a way, I want to miss taking losses as I lived on the outer edges of my skill because that is where growth is and it’s what made me better…it’s what made me feel alive.
I hope I see alignment in most things. I hope the stars above never lose their intrigue with me and call me by name to come home.
I hope time is not a diminishing resource I chase any longer. I want to be tired of it and done with it; grateful I had as much as I did, but happy it’s close to running out.
I hope I let my body die without much concern for who I am or where I’m going. I hope there is little struggle here and that I thank God one last time before the “me” as I know it fades into nothing and I’m reborn elsewhere in some other way.